#491 - Sweet Mistress Cyn - 15 Misconceptions About Adult Workers
On today's KinkyCast episode 491, we present, The top 15 misconceptions regarding professional adult workers! Woody and Sweet Mistress Cyn talk about a list of misconceptions gathered from a group of adult workers in the Dallas area. (The audio podcast is below the questions - scroll down)
1. Pro must equal prostitute so course, I will likely get to have sex with her.
This is not automatically the case.
2.) If you're getting paid, you don't enjoy it and it's all about the money
I can't speak for every adult worker, but I believe for the majority, this is false.There are many, many things an adult worker could be doing instead. At some point, the majority of adult workers all go through some degree of questioning, shaming, judgement and/or misunderstanding by others due to our occupation.To a large degree, it also causes us to have to be secretive.We also go through many gross & unpredictable circumstances.We see things many people in the medical field would see, plus have the extra added overhead expense of clothing, gear, advertising, etc.For the majority of us, it’s not just a job but an adventure, so this statement couldn’t be further from the truth.Men seem to forget they are still going to pay in one way or the other in vanilla dating or marriage, yet even in a vanilla situation there are no guarantees their needs will be met.Seeing a good provider you really connect with can be really good as they can take care of personal intimacy and fetish topics not just anyone may want to participate in.
3. If you see a pro domme, you are automatically going to get beat to the point of marks, fucked with a strap on, something will be foisted upon you, or all the above.
This is untrue.There are some pro dommes that don't care what you want and will do with you whatever they please, (these are usually the ones you see wearing latex, holding a whip and shooting you the middle finger in their ads) but the majority DO listen to your needs and will customize the session based on your needs and BOTH your boundaries. In other words, if you ask for impact play, most pros will not hit you any harder than you can take.They all generally follow the RACK method, which is: risk aware consensual kink. By automatically assuming you're automatically going to receive marks or have something foisted upon you, it shows you have not done your full due diligence to properly research the lady you have decided to see to the point you feel comfortable with your own choice.Aside from her ad, it is not up to the pro lady to further convince you why you should see her. It is up to YOU to thoroughly read her ad or website, and to do your own research to assuage any fears or concerns you may have. Jumping to this conclusion before the session has ever started also makes a bad impression because it shows you don't trust her right away.There is a time to share your interests and hard limits, but don't go on and on with the hard limits. Clearly communicate, then let go and let her do her job.
4.) Pro ladies who are also fetish models automatically will do the same thing you may see that they do on film with other models.This also goes for Pro subs - there is an assumption that they too will automatically do whatever the viewer sees them doing on fetish films and this is not always the case, either.
5.)Last minute session requests - the pro lady I am considering must just be sitting around waiting for the phone to ringContrary to popular belief, we are NOT sitting around waiting for the phone to ring.Once again, thoroughly read the lady's ad. If her ad says she needs notice, pay attention and respect that.She's saying this for a reason. It is very disrespectful to not give the notice she's asked for.
6.)Not being forthcoming about giving your name and a proper introduction for automatic fear your privacy is going to be violated, you are going to get ripped off, or both.Again, read the lady's ad or website. Do a search on her. Read what her requirements are. Check to see if she is verifiable online and has a good reputation.Now imagine yourself in her shoes. If a total stranger called you for a session and you were going to host this person at your private abode, what would you want to know that would make you feel safe?There are without a doubt some scammers out there, but by doing your own due diligence to reasearch the lady in advance, this should spare
7.) It's your "right" to get excessive details before making a deposit &/or a booking with a proRead the lady's webpage or ad! That tells you everything you'll need to know.Most pros will provide some sort of free consult that stays within respectful lines, but SHE leads the conversation- not you.If you need more info beyond that, book an online session.Excessive details is a paid activity for pros.Both your time and the pro's time is valuable.
8.)Automatically assuming the lady you are with is going to secretly film the online or in person session.Once again, thoroughly read the lady's ad and do a search regarding her background and reputation.It is disrespectful to automatically assume such a negative thing due to your own paranoia.
We have ZERO reason to want to film an online or in person session. We actually sometimes wonder if YOU may be doing the same thing.The law prohibits anyone from publicly posting anything without a model's release.
9.)That we are secretly "holding back" on what we REALLY like.We advertise all of what we feel comfortable with doing with our clients.If we didn't like it, we wouldn't waste the time to advertise it.Some things we reserve to save for the one we are involved in a vanilla personal relationship with, or maybe we have other reasons for not doing whatever it is you are hoping for that isn't listed.
10.)You have to have an official website to be successful, trustworthy, or both.Yes, it helps, but not mandatory. There are many ladies that work more "under the radar" that have no website at all and can only be contacted via email.
11.)Your mistress or disciplinarian has to attend a party or event to be successful or you have to attend to not feel left out Neither could not be further from the truth. Most fetish parties and events can be very clickish, sometimes you may walk away feeling left out, and sometimes the host can be doing it more for his or her own power and recognition rather than humble reasons. There have even been instances of some event hosts even bullying those that they don't personally like. If you want to avoid potential drama and have a more personalized, positively predictable experience, stick with one on one professional sessions.
12.) Facesitting automatically means I'll get to do oral on the lady This also could not be further from the truth. Generally speaking, facesitting in the escort world means without underwear and there is usually oral involved.Facesitting in the BDSM world underwear is usually left on and it is more teasing, breath play and panty sniffing.Queening on the other hand, does involve oral sex.
13.) The adult diaper fetish, ABDL or Paraphilic infantilism is associated with pedophilia. Either the giver &/or recipient must be into children..This could also not be further from the truth. People with this fetish are not attracted to children and do not seek them as sexual partners, they simply want to be TREATED as a child.NAMBLA (the North American Man/Boy love association) the Newgon Organization and IPCE are just a few organizations that advocates adult sexual behavior with children.Again, the ABDL fetish is not into kids, just being treated as one.
14.) Pros in the adult industry automatically must have STD's
15.) Pros in the adult industry are incapable of having a committed/monogamous relationship
Keywords: podcast, kinkycast, pro, dome, lady, sex, worker, adult, visit, paid, escort, BDSM, massage, misconception
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